Things I Love in DC

I know I sometimes complain about living in a big city.  But there are definite benefits.  I happen upon cool things all the time.  This boxcar village set up across the street from the National's Ball Park.  Before and after games its bustling with food, drink, live music and people.  But on a morning run it is just quiet.

  This bird who screamed "Hello!" when I walked up to a neighborhood nursery.  I thought it was a fake at first, one of those movement activated things, but no he was very real indeed and apparently shy about having his photo taken.

That an early evening walk from our apartment can look like this.......

 That you step out of the Metro on Dupont Circle and find free swing lessons and big band music!

That Taylor has a second job at this upscale, all organic and local food market.

 That a walk around the neighborhood of said market has architecture and landscaping like this.....

Taylor Turns Twenty

 So the baby boy leaves the teen years behind today.  He got a lot of attention when he was born because there was a pretty big gap after Jessica and Nicholas who were born 18 months apart, and then an 8 year wait for little Taylor.  He was adored by his older siblings and they were a great help in watching over him.

He was a funny kid.  Lots of personality from the time he was just a baby.  He LOVED singing and dancing to all my old Disney records and knew all the music. He loved costumes.  He was VERY into dinosaurs (I always thought this was because we took him into Jurassic Park as an infant...I remember nursing him in the theatre) and he could do a spot on imitation of a velociraptor.  Seriously dead on imitation.

He also went through a phase where he HAD to wear a hat.  Not just any hat, but THIS particular green hat.  Wore it everywhere.  For years! Would get very upset when I wanted to wash it because it required him actually taking it off so I could do it.  He said the hat gave him confidence.

 He loved Lego's and making videos.  He and his friends would make little movies and he went through a phase where in every photo we took, he was doing this "hand on the chin" pose.

He took skiing lessons with his cousins then switched to snowboarding, but decided he liked skiing better and went back.  He, like the rest of the family never caught that Utah "Oh I HAVE to ski every weekend" bug.  We are once a year skiers.

He's the only Eagle Scout in our families.

He's traveled a lot.  When Tom was on active duty we would go see him in DC and in California when he was there, not to mention trips to New Jersey and NYC, so Taylor has a lot of miles on him.  He's also traveled with Tom on Coast Guard Trips and took a trip to China with friends from high school.

Taylor and Tom in Branson

Taylor, Maddie and Matt

 He's a musician, plays guitar, bass, bongos and is a great vocalist as well.  If you can get him to sing.  He attended The School of Rock and then played in a band with Nic and some friends called FLOW.  We think he has replaced his hat wearing fetish with a need for having long hair.  He's concerned about the environment, what we eat, how animals are cared for and doesn't look at the world exactly as we do.  He's exploring his spiritual options, reads a lot, loves buying old record albums and is genuinely troubled by the state of the world and it's focus on capitalism.  He wants to live off the grid.  He wants nothing more than his own little plot of land (preferably our back yard in Farmington) to grow his food.  He is our little hippie. But we are crazy about him and he makes us think, laugh and look at the world in a different way every day.

The Cherry Blossoms

So, it's almost 4 AM and I'm clearly not sleeping so thought I'd just share some photos of the illustrious cherry blossoms in our nation's capital.

They get a lot of hype and given the wacky weather of late I started to wonder if they'd appear at all, but after a very warm (85 degrees) day they suddenly sprouted and did not disappoint.

 I've been walking Tom to work then going for a run, but on this particular day I ran around the base at Ft. McNair and ended up stopping and shooting more than I ran!

 A couple of days later and the night before The Cherry Blossom Parade we took a walk before dinner to The Jefferson Memorial and along with hundreds of our closest friends, took in the blossoms there as well.

The Day After

We got up early Saturday morning and headed to Eleanor's house to continue boxing things up.  The plan was to work until mid-afternoon then head home.  She had a beautiful Lenox set of China that was supposed to go to Dennis but he didn't want it so little Denny and his wife Karen came and got it.

Tom's dad worked at the Lenox factory part time after he retired so we all got some lovely Lenox pieces over the years.  Some were seconds and had a little chip here and there, but they were still usable and beautiful.

We boxed up everything in her kitchen as well.  Eleanor's father (Nicholas) was a chef so he had some great old knives.  Eleanor was a great cook as well and has passed that skill to Marie.  Joe and Dennis had already gotten everything they wanted so we picked out some things to keep for ourselves and some things for our kids to have.  Also pulled aside some items we were pretty sure Marie would want.

 Some treasures in the basement!

 Tom's dad took up golf later in life and loved it!  Almost as much as he loved scouring the courses for lost golf balls.  We found this trunk full of them!

 Tom found several flags that needed to be burned.

 We decided to leave Eleanor's room so Marie could go through it herself.

Some of the stuff was very dusty and Eleanor's cat had left hair everywhere.  I had a very runny nose once my allergy pill wore off.  Marie has taken in the cat, by the way.  I'm sure El is pleased about that. I didn't realize how late we had worked but Marie called to suggest we stay the night, leave in the morning and go to dinner with she and Victor.  I thought it was about 3 PM but it was 6!!  We finished up, ran to her place, changed and met Victor at The Crab Trap.  He bought us a heavenly meal (he suggested the crab cakes and oh my gosh, they were the best I've ever had!) and told us stories of starting his business.  He's done very well but is one of the most down to earth, sweet, generous and positive people I know.  Everywhere we go with him, people know and love him.  All the servers flock to him in any restaurants we go to because I'm sure he leaves generous tips, but mostly because he shows interest in them and their lives.  Anyway, it was a lovely way to wrap up another busy day.  Marie did our laundry for us so we could get to bed and we got up early again so we could make a pit stop at El's house, put a few more things away and vacuum before a realtor comes this week to look at it.  Still plenty of stuff to go through but that's for another weekend.

We drove home via Philadelphia while we listened to Willa Cather's O Pioneers!  It was nice to just listen.

Eleanor's Service

Tom and I drove home Easter afternoon and spent the rest of the week scanning pictures, putting together a dvd and trying to help plan the service and after luncheon. It makes me a little crazy because I am a planner and an organizer and I want to know what's happening, who is making it happen and what the timetable looks like.  Tom's family.....not so much.  So it's been a week of trying to not step on toes, not take over, keeping in mind it is THEIR mom, but still have a nice service.

After a few tense days it finally ended up being a lovely service that I think would have made her very happy.  Marie and Victor are friends with an 89 year old monsignor who conducted the service and didn't do a Catholic mass but just some lovely prayers and scripture readings.  Joey read a section from the gospels, Tom wrote and delivered a beautiful eulogy and I sang "I'll Be Seeing You" which is lovely old tune from the 40's that is especially meaningful for World War II veterans.

When you're 89 years old you don't have a lot of contemporaries come to your service but there were neighbors, friends of Tom's siblings, and family.  During these past few months there have been some difficult times but there has also been reconciliation over past hurts so in the end, Eleanor would have been very happy I think.

Victor, Monsignor and Marie

The black box is her cremated remains.

Kathy, Dennis and daughter, Nicole

Joey, Dennis, Eleanor's brother Bill, Marie, Tom and their cousin Susan.

Siblings and spouses

The family before dad Joe passed away in 1997

 Dennis had to go back to work, Joe and Karen had to finish packing as they were taking off the next morning for NC where he's starting a new job, and Marie went to run errands so Tom and I cleaned up after the buffet luncheon at her house. Tons of food left over so we were able to share a bunch and we'll have plenty for days. After she got back the three of us treated ourselves to a walk on the boardwalk in Brigantine to just relax and have some fresh salt air in our faces. It was heavenly.

Eleanor

Photo that Tom took of his mom several weeks ago

 We hadn't planned to spend Easter in NJ because I was supposed to teach Sunday School and we planned to go the following weekend.  But Saturday afternoon, Marie called and said that Eleanor's condition had changed, so we threw our stuff together, arranged for a substitute teacher and raced to NJ.

 We went straight to the rest home. Eleanor was on oxygen and her breathing was irregular and rattled. Her eyes were closed and she was unresponsive though we tried to wake her to tell her we were there. We were there a while by ourselves then Marie came back from dinner and their brother Dennis came by.  Joey and Karen were in the process of moving the boat from Charleston to New Bern, NC.  They had gotten held up in bad weather so there was no way for him to get there.  Marie had held her phone up so Joe could talk to mom and the same with Eleanor's brother, Bill.

There was a definite change in her, but nobody said to us that death was imminent.  I guess I was expecting better communication with the family and hospice but when I asked that night before we left about it, Marie said that the nurse on duty was in communication with hospice and they would call us if anything changed.  The nurse did say we could stay through the night and asked if she had a rosary which, as we look back on it should have been hints that it was close, but it just didn't register.  When grandma was nearing death, hospice was very clear with us that the end was near so we were with her the whole time.

Easter morning we got up, looked through the booklet that hospice had given us that had the list of things to watch for that would indicate death was near. Most of them applied to Eleanor except the surge of energy which clearly wasn't going to happen.  Tom and I left Marie's to go to El's house to see if we could find her rosary and we were going to meet Marie at the rest home.  We couldn't find the rosary so we had just pulled in to a store to buy her one when Marie called and said the nurse had just contacted her that Eleanor had passed.  We raced over there and were the first to arrive.  We must have missed it by minutes because she was still warm.  Even though we had all talked to her night before, expressing love and letting her know it was okay to go.....we were all still sick that she was by herself when she actually passed.

Marie, Dennis and his son Denny all arrived and we stayed with her awhile.  The woman from hospice came and said that Eleanor had apparently had her surge of energy Thursday night when she was sitting up and eating.....but no one had mentioned it to the family.  I just wish there had been better communication between them all.  However, Eleanor has been ready to go for quite a while and when I think of her being reunited with all of her friends and family who have been gone for a long, long time, I am really happy that she has transitioned into her new life.

I love this photo of her.  She was a great cook and she looks so happy!